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What to Say (and Not to) in a First Online Dating Message | Psychology Today

13 Sep We analyzed over , first contacts on our dating site, OkCupid. Our program looked at keywords and phrases, how they affected reply rates, and what trends were statistically significant. The result: a set of rules for what you should and shouldn't say when introducing yourself. Online dating advice at. 6 Sep Should You Play it Cool? If you are the recipient of a first-contact message on a dating site, is it better to play it cool and not show too much initial interest, and make the message sender wait a while for a reply? Contrary to what we might think, it has been demonstrated that eager replies are not perceived. Smart guys are vigilant about keeping online dating message conversations going. People can be forgetful Here are message examples and tricks to use so she doesn't forget about you. Read More ›.

The next stage is either to sit and wait to be contacted by a potential date, or to look through the site and proactively start sending messages to potential dates yourself.

You are reading Love, Digitally. After she replies to your first message, you usually visit her profile again to figure out what to say next, right? And have a plan. A polite introduction goes a long way and echoes something you would actually say in real life, demonstrating that you have good manners.

Surely, one of the things any online dater would want to know is what type of first contact message is most likely to draw a positive response. Should it be humorous, should it be factual, or should you just introduce yourself?

Further, exactly how much should you say about yourself in this message?

What Do You Say In An Online Dating Message

The researchers carried out an ambitious analysis offirst-contact messages What Do You Say In An Online Dating Message by 3, users.

If you are the recipient of a first-contact message on a dating site, is it better to play it cool and not show too much initial interest, and make the message sender wait a while for a reply? Contrary to what we might think, it has been demonstrated that eager replies are not perceived as a turn-off. Are there visit web page differences in who is more likely to make first contact?

In their study, Hitsch, Hortacsu and Ariely found that:. When it comes to responding, Fiore et al found that males replied to more first-contact messages than females 26 percent compared to 16 percent. This theory suggests that because of the relative risks that reproduction poses to males and females, males tend to overestimate female sexual interest known as an overperception bias. However, in the online dating world, it is not uncommon for messages to go unanswered and ignored, and such behavior is not normally considered to be offensive.

One possible reason for this is the degree of online disinhibition Suler, users experience in an environment in which they feel relatively anonymous. Even relatively impersonal responses such as simply saying "no, thank you," with no explanation are considered acceptable. Some people using online dating sites may not look at their messages that often or may have found someone and left the dating site altogether, even though their profile is still present. I'm bored to death at work so I decided to check out your see more on my iphone during lunch break.

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PLENTY OF FISH MESSAGES - 3 Openers & Text Examples To Get More Girls

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Over Online Dating First Message Examples to Pick & Choose From

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What Do You Say In An Online Dating Message

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Online Dating First Message Tips: Opening Lines that Work

Get Listed on Psychology Today. Submitted by Anthony on September 11, - 5: Does it work for all sites? Will it work for https: Add new comment Psychology Today Submitted by source cuoc bong da on November 23, - 4: Add new comment Psychology Today Submitted by footwind.

How to Submitted by Chris on December 26, - Post Comment Your name. E-mail The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly. Notify me when new comments are posted. Replies to my comment. You are reading Love, Digitally. Are we becoming obsessed with online snooping?

I think we have a lot in common. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to help others. The questions are the gas. What stands out to you as interesting in her profile?

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What's Your Online Dating Style?